This is not just another collection of war stories, nor is it a dissertation on strength and triumph. It is a cautionary tale of the personal and professional effects of post-traumatic stress injuries, reaching too far and attempting to go it alone. This memoir is a snapshot of the origin, journey, and twilight of a thirty-year career dedicated to serving others and the toll it took.

This story is not unique. Regrettably, there is good company in the shadows-responders and service members, each concealed in the folds, even from one another. They fear stigma, speculation, consequences, and, worst of all, their truths. They are always anxious about being discovered, being perceived as weak, inadequate, or unworthy of the company they keep.

On these pages, you will not find any halos. You will, however, encounter successes, near misses, hard-earned lessons, and a steep fall from the pinnacle of professional achievement, only to find a path to purpose.