Quinn Marcelo wouldn't necessarily win the award for Most Popular Person at her school, but unbeknownst to her peers, Quinn entertains them at every football, basketball, and baseball game--as Peaches the Parrot, her high school's God-like mascot.
When someone sabotages the legendary Peaches costume at the Homecoming Game, Quinn's left unmasked and humiliated. After all, Peaches' identity was a closely guarded secret and a point of pride for nearly everyone at Olivia Newton-John High. As if that wasn't enough, Little Peaches, a new, real parrot that the PTA got to enhance the Peaches Experience, is kidnapped right after Quinn's unmasking. Determined to uncover the culprit, Quinn publicly unravels the lives of everyone in her path--including Tessa Banks, the most popular girl in school--in a no-holds-barred conspiracy-fueled investigation. But when a killer starts going after the people implicated in Quinn's mascot disaster, she must race to uncover the truth behind her feathery faux-pas--before the truth kills her, too.It is the year 4022; all of the ancient country of Usa has been buried under many feet of detritus from a catastrophe that occurred back in 1985. Imagine, then, the excitement that Howard Carson, an amateur archeologist at best, experienced when in crossing the perimeter of an abandoned excavation site he felt the ground give way beneath him and found himself at the bottom of a shaft, which, judging from the DO NOT DISTURB sign hanging from an archaic doorknob, was clearly the entrance to a still-sealed burial chamber. Carson's incredible discoveries, including the remains of two bodies, one of then on a ceremonial bed facing an altar that appeared to be a means of communicating with the Gods and the other lying in a porcelain sarcophagus in the Inner Chamber, permitted him to piece together the whole fabric of that extraordinary civilization.
From the award-winning author of The Field Guide to the North American Teenager comes a whip-smart and layered romantic comedy. Perfect for fans of Nicola Yoon and Jenny Han.
Henri Halti Haltiwanger can charm just about anyone. He is a star debater and popular student at the prestigious FATE academy, the dutiful first-generation Haitian son, and the trusted dog walker for his wealthy New York City neighbors. But his easy smiles mask a burning ambition to attend his dream college, Columbia University.
There is only one person who seems immune to Henri's charms: his intense classmate and neighbor Corinne Troy. When she uncovers Henri's less-than-honest dog-walking scheme, she blackmails him into helping her change her image at school. Henri agrees, seeing a potential upside for himself.
Soon what started as a mutual hustle turns into something more surprising than either of them ever bargained for. . . .
This is a sharply funny and insightful novel about the countless hustles we have to keep from doing the hardest thing: being ourselves.
Like all young people, Purdy is a superhero in his head. This fantasy withers when it rubs up against his mundane real life, living with his mom in a small desert town. Then a mysterious voice leads him to fall through a crack in reality, Sockworld, a separate dimension where he acquires amazing powers. Superpowers make life super complicated. Can he save the world, mend his family, and find his way back from the edge of space in time for supper? Hold on to your socks, you're in for a wild ride.
That's Debatable is a witty, smart, and feminist romantic comedy, author Jen Doll explores what it means to set boundaries while breaking down barriers.
Millicent Chalmers isn't here to make friends. She's here to win, and she's on track to set a record if--no, when--she wins the state debate tournament for the fourth year in a row. Calm, cool, and always in control, Millie doesn't care what anyone else thinks of her, least of all the sexist bullies bent on destroying her reputation. Taggart Strong couldn't care less about winning debate, much to the consternation of his teammates, school and parents. In fact, he might even enjoy losing, as long as the side he believes in wins. But when a tournament takes a scary turn, Millie and Tag find themselves unexpectedly working together. Maybe Millie can teach Tag a thing or two about using his head, and Tag can teach Millie a little bit about following her heart.When the escapades of Audrey Labadie's cheating boyfriend take center stage during a show rehearsal, she up and leaves her beloved theater group to avoid the humiliation. Finding refuge in her high school's dance squad, she believes the drama is behind her. Until the earthquake.
Audrey's dreams become plagued with creepy tentacle creatures crawling out of a sinkhole underneath her school in the aftermath of the seemingly unnatural natural disaster. Dreams that soon become a horrific reality for her and her new teammates.
Faced with an ancient evil intent on taking over their small town, Audrey and her ragtag group of friends are the only ones dancing in their way. Every dance squad has its rivals, but she didn't expect them to have gills.
Elder God Dance Squad is a perfect literary storm where Stranger Things and Bring It On collide into a dark and hilarious genre mash-up of epic proportion.
Grab your copy of Elder God Dance Squad today and discover the thrilling Lovecraftian remix from Marvel writer Carrie Harris that everyone is raving about!
The Goodbye Family and the Great Mountain follows the lives of Weird West undertakers Otis, Pyridine, and their daughter Orphie. Pyridine is a witch and matriarch mortician, Otis is a brainless but bold hearse driver, and Orphie is appointed grave digger for her strength of twenty men. Through bumbling, Otis discovers his neighbors are turning into zombies, a mystery that is directly affecting their burial business. In their backyard cemetery, they travel to the underworld for answers and uncover a plot to surface the evil entities that would otherwise burn in the Lake of Fire, have risen again through oil pumps that are bottled up as a tonic medicine for the ground above. The tonic goes fast, and the host takes over the body when the body perishes. Can the Goodbyes hilarious gaffes and revelations plug up the works? Find out in this fast-paced carriage ride through the underworld. The story includes an exclusive foreword by entertainer and medium Richard-Lael Lillard.
Only a Comedy Keeper can save laughter at its source In this novel for serious class clowns, 12-year old Josh Markowitz must travel back to 1908 to convince an unruly family of very funny brothers to fulfill their comic destinies. It starts when Josh, the Class Clown of Patton Middle School in McMinnville, Oregon gets in trouble (again) for being a little bit too funny in school. The detention he receives threatens to ruin his baseball season. His friends Omar, Amy and the fabulous, fake English exchange student Elizabeth Walcot Woolcott all sympathize, but the evil Stevie San Pedro thinks Josh deserves his punishment. Josh goes to the old magic shop on the wrong side of town where an ageless clown named Slivers makes Josh a deal: Convince some old friends of his to become comedians, and Slivers will get him out of detention. The friends are the famous Marx Brothers - Groucho, Harpo, Chico, Gummo and Zeppo -- long before they would begin their careers as comedians and movie stars, and they need a kick-start from history. As a Comedy Keeper, Josh must convince the funny brothers to take up comedy, or be forever lost to history. Without a boost from him, Slivers explains, there would never be Marx Brothers movies, and without that there would be no Saturday Night Live, Jerry Seinfeld or Simpsons. The future of comedy depends on Josh Josh activates The Great Wandini - a magical fortune-telling machine that can send people careening through time, and he is transported to the streets of New York City in 1908, where he is befriended by none other than Julius, Arthur and Leonard Marx . . . the brothers who would one day become famous. But only if Josh succeeds The brothers Marx don't even know they're comedians yet; they have a singing act in vaudeville theaters with their mother, Minnie, and have no intention of changing it. But after witnessing much hilarity between the brothers at their cramped apartment, Josh convinces them that their future lies in comedy. To convince Minnie to change the act, Josh will have to go onstage and start the comedy ball rolling. Meanwhile, in the present, Josh's friends try to figure out how and why he disappeared and have some adventures of their own in Slivers' Magic Shop and with the Great Wandini. Through a magical interface with the old New York Evening Standard newspaper, they can text Slivers to find and rescue Josh from the past. Before that happens, though, and before he can return to his own time, Josh is nabbed by an evil bull - a corrupt policeman who conscripts children into slave labor in the textile mills of upstate New York. Josh is dragged away to the Oneida Textile Mills and what looks like a life of hard labor. But the Marx Brothers intercede in a very funny way - by pretending that Julius is the African Explorer, Adolph and Leonard are natives, and they need a boy to take back to the dark continent. Josh is rescued, but the brothers still aren't sure about him until Josh reveals that he was sent by Frank Slivers Oakley, a real clown who was the toast of Broadway in the early years of the 20th century. The Marx Brothers finally believe his story and agree to fulfill their destinies as comics. With Josh in tow, they head to Coney Island in time to perform, bring the house down with jokes and antics, and set the brothers on the course of becoming famous. The Comedy Keeper is many things: A rollicking, funny, fast tale, a tribute to classic comedy, a historical novel with period detail of 1908 New York City, and an introduction for young readers to the Marx Brothers, with authentic details of their lives and careers. Best read with a hard-boiled egg. Um...better make that six hard-boiled eggs. Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's much too dark to read. - Julius Groucho Marx
When Lacy wakes up dead in Westminster Cemetery, final resting place of Edgar Allan Poe, she's confused. It's the job of Sam, a young soldier who died in 1865, to teach her the rules of the afterlife and to warn her about Suppression--a punishment worse than death.
Lacy desperately wants to leave the cemetery and find out how she died, but every soul is obligated to perform a job. Given the task of providing entertainment, Lacy proposes an open mic, which becomes a chance for the cemetery's residents to express themselves. But Lacy is in for another shock when surprising and long-buried truths begin to emerge.
Like Siberia itself, this story is wild, mysterious, full of danger--and then, quite unexpectedly, captivates you with its beauty. I was so glad I went on the adventure. --Goldy Moldavsky, New York Times bestselling author of Kill the Boy Band
Notes from My Captivity is a sharp, sensitive, and darkly funny novel perfect for fans of Libba Bray's Beauty Queens and Adam Silvera's More Happy Than Not.
Adrienne Cahill cares about three things: getting into a great college; becoming a revered journalist like her idol, Sydney Declay; and making her late father proud of her.
So when Adrienne is offered the chance to write an article that will get her into her dream school and debunk her foolish stepfather's belief that a legendary family of hermits is living in the Siberian wilderness, there's no question that she's going to fly across the world.
But the Russian terrain is even less forgiving than Adrienne. And when disaster strikes, none of their extensive preparations seem to matter. Now Adrienne's being held captive by the family she was convinced didn't exist, and her best hope for escape is to act like she cares about them, even if it means wooing the youngest son.
MELVINGE OF THE MAGAVERSE SERIES
NIGHT OF THE LIVING SHARK
A SHARK JUST ATE YOUR DISGUSTING SNEAKERS-- AND YOU'RE STILL INSIDE THEM
Imagine there's this mall, and it's the biggest thing you've ever seen in the whole universe. It's so big it's going to take your whole life just to find a place to park in one of its fifty qualjillion parking lots. Now imagine you're the biggest schlub in the universe. Your name is Melvinge. You're on your way to the mall with your faithful dogoid companion Harlan. Only you've bitten off more than you can chew, even if you had ten thousand sets of teeth.
You see, there are these Gypies waiting along the turnpike, and one of them will bite Melvinge and turn him into a werewolf. Then there's Shdark, the Loan Shark. What Shdark can't have, Shdark eats. Which includes not only Melvinge and Harlan, but their interdimensional recreational vehicle, the Grabovnikon Ever have one of those nights. . . ?
DANIEL M. PINKWATER'S MELVINGE OF THE MEGAVERSE
The weird and wacky mind of Daniel M. Pinkwater (author of The Snarkout Boys and the Avocado of Death and National Public Radio celebrity), invaded by noted science fiction author David Bischoff, has created the ultimate quest
MELVINGE OF THE MAGAVERSE, BOOK 2
NIGHT OF THE LIVING RAT
RAT GOT YOUR TONGUE?
Imagine there's this mall, and it's the biggest thing you've ever seen in the whole universe. It's so big it's going to take your whole life just to find a place to park in one of its fifty quajillion parking lots.
Now imagine you're the biggest schlub in the universe. Your name is Melvinge. You're on your way to the mall with your faithful dogoid companion, Harlan. Only you've bitten off more than you can chew, even if you had ten thousand sets of teeth.
When we last saw Melvinge, he had been turned into a werewolf and shot to death with a silver bullet. Now, the
Neitherworld just isn't what Melvinge expected. Sdark, the
Card Shark, is looking for him. Harlan is continuing their quest alone. And lunatic revolutionaries are infiltrating the One True Mall in search of power, glory, and all-night dancing. Ever have one of those nights...?
DANIEL M. PINKWATER'S
MELVINGE OF
THE MAGAVERSE
Scared to death
Scared to look
They shook... and that might get them killed!
Warning
This Book Contains:
If you love Dread Nation Z-Nation Black Summer Resident Evil Zombie Fallout and Slow Burn Then you will love this series!
This is a stand alone novella in the Planet Dead Universe
Planet Dead
Planet Dead 2: Patient Zero
Planet Dead 3: Promise Land
Are All Available in eBook & Paperback