A groundbreaking approach for practicing courageous love and resilient intimacy--from the creator of Internal Family Systems therapy

Do loving relationships end because couples lack communication skills, struggle to empathize, and fail to accommodate each other's needs? That's a common belief within and outside of the therapeutic world... but what if it's all wrong? In You Are the One You've Been Waiting For, Dr. Richard Schwartz, the celebrated founder of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, offers a new way--a path toward courageous love that replaces the striving, dependent, and disconnected approach to solving relationship challenges.

The breakthrough realization of IFS is that our psyche contains multiple parts, each with a life of its own. Most problems in relationships arise because we unknowingly burden our partner with the task of caring for our disowned and unloved parts. In this book, you'll discover essential insights and tools to foster healthy dialogue with your parts and your partner, including:

- How to recognize and disarm the cultural assumptions that create shame, guilt, and isolation in relationships
- The Three Projects--why we fool ourselves into thinking we must change our partner, change ourselves, or give up on true intimacy
- Finding and Healing Exiles--transforming the way our most vulnerable parts influence the way we treat each other
- How to reorient relationship conflicts to help each of us grow toward the Self--the center of our clarity and wisdom
- Courageous Love--building resilient intimacy with each other and our parts to create healthy, lasting partnerships

No one can do the work of healing our orphaned parts for us, says Dr. Schwartz. Yet when we begin with Self-leadership, a relationship can become a safe place in which we help each other heal and grow. Here is an invaluable guide for therapists and laypersons alike to promote connection, trust, and understanding--within yourself and with the one you love.

A highly accessible introduction to a therapeutic approach that brings our inner parts into harmony and allows our core Self to lead

We're all familiar with self-talk, self-doubt, self-judgment--yet most of us still view ourselves as if we have one uniform mind. Dr. Richard Schwartz's breakthrough was recognizing that we each contain an internal family of distinct parts--and that treating these parts with curiosity, respect, and empathy vastly expands our capacity to heal.

Over the past two decades, Internal Family Systems (IFS) has transformed the practice of psychotherapy. With Introduction to Internal Family Systems, the creator of IFS presents the ideal layperson's guide for understanding this empowering, effective, and non-pathologizing approach to self-discovery and healing. Here, Dr. Schwartz shares evidence, case studies, and self-care tools to help you:

- Shift from the limiting mono-mind paradigm into an appreciation of your marvelous, multidimensional nature
- Unburden your wounded parts from extreme beliefs, emotions, and addictions
- Demystify the most commonly misunderstood parts--the Exiles, Managers, and Firefighters
- Transform your most challenging parts from inner obstacles to invaluable allies
- Embrace the existence of innate human goodness--in yourself and others
- Connect with the true Self that is greater than the sum of your parts

The most wonderful discovery I have made is that as you do this work, you release, or liberate, what I call your Self or your True Self--the calm, compassionate essence of who you are, says Dr. Schwartz. When the Self becomes the leading intelligence in our lives, we create more harmony--both within ourselves and in our external lives. For therapists, their clients, and anyone interested in understanding and healing themselves, here is an essential guide to a revolutionary approach to self-realization, mental wellness, and transformation.

If you are struggling with issues of betrayal--or the challenge of whether and how to forgive--here is the most helpful and surprising book you will ever find on the subject.--Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of The Dance of Anger

Everyone is struggling to forgive someone: an unfaithful partner, an alcoholic parent, an ungrateful child, a terrorist. This award-winning book provides a radical way for hurt parties to heal themselves--without forgiving, as well as a way for offenders to earn genuine forgiveness.

Until now, we've been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Janis Abrahms Spring, a gifted clinical psychologist and award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives--without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for earning genuine forgiveness--one that asks as much of the offender as it does of the hurt party.

Beautifully written and filled with insight, practical advice, and poignant case studies, this bold and healing book offers step-by-step, concrete instructions that help us make peace with others and ourselves, while answering such crucial questions as these:

How do I forgive someone who is unremorseful or dead?When is forgiveness cheap?Can I heal myself - without forgiving?How can the offender earn forgiveness?What makes for a good apology?How do we forgive ourselves for hurting another human being?

How traumatic events can break our vital connections--and how to restore love, wholeness, and resiliency in your life.

From our earliest years, we develop an attachment style that follows us through life, replaying in our daily emotional landscape, our relationships, and how we feel about ourselves. And in the wake of a traumatic event--such as a car accident, severe illness, loss of a loved one, or experience of abuse--that attachment style can deeply influence what happens next.

In The Power of Attachment, Dr. Diane Poole Heller, a pioneer in attachment theory and trauma resolution, shows how overwhelming experiences can disrupt our most important connections-- with the parts of ourselves within, with the physical world around us, and with others.

The good news is that we can restore and reconnect at all levels, regardless of our past.

Here, you'll learn key insights and practices to help you:

- Restore the broken connections caused by trauma
- Get embodied and grounded in your body
- Integrate the parts of yourself that feel wounded and fragmented
- Emerge from grief, fear, and powerlessness to regain strength, joy, and resiliency
- Reclaim access to your inner resources and spiritual nature

We are fundamentally designed to heal, teaches Dr. Heller. Even if our childhood is less than ideal, our secure attachment system is biologically programmed in us, and our job is to simply find out what's interfering with it--and learn what we can do to make those secure tendencies more dominant.

With expertise drawn from Dr. Heller's research, clinical work, and training programs, this book invites you to begin that journey back to wholeness.

Now significantly revised with over 70% new material, this is the authoritative presentation of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, which is taught and practiced around the world. IFS reveals how the subpersonalities or parts of each individual's psyche relate to each other like members of a family, and how--just as in a family--polarization among parts can lead to emotional suffering. IFS originator Richard Schwartz and master clinician Martha Sweezy explain core concepts and provide practical guidelines for implementing IFS with clients who are struggling with trauma, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addiction, and other behavioral problems. They also address strategies for treating families and couples. IFS therapy is listed in SAMHSA's National Registry of Evidence-Based Programs and Practices.

New to This Edition
*Extensively revised to reflect 25 years of conceptual refinement, expansion of IFS techniques, and a growing evidence base.
*Chapters on the Self, the body and physical illness, the role of the therapist, specific clinical strategies, and couple therapy.
*Enhanced clinical utility, with significantly more how-to details, case examples, and sample dialogues.
*Quick-reference boxes summarizing key points, and end-of-chapter summaries.

See also Internal Family Systems Therapy for Shame and Guilt, by Martha Sweezy.

It's me. No, it's you. Maybe it's both of us? We all want to avoid drama and pain in our relationships, yet we remain stuck in never-ending cycles of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and triggering interactions. Sometimes it just seems easier to decide we are done with people rather than continue trying over and over again. Even our best and closest relationships - with our partners, friends, family, and colleagues - can feel unduly challenging. In this straightforward guide, expert relationship therapists, Ilene Cohen and Edrica Richardson get to the heart of what it means to really be in fulfilling relationships and why connecting with the ones you love can feel so hard. You'll learn how doing the work encourages healing and growth within yourself and within your relationships. Filled with activities, quizzes, and prompts that offer support in every step of the process, This Isn't Working for Me will help you go deeper in your relationships by exploring: * Six steps to creating the relationships you want - Discover the foundational elements that will help you build (or build back) strong, sustainable connections. * Self-empowerment - Learn how a willingness to focus on yourself helps cultivate resilience, trust, and a stronger sense of self. * The science of relationships - Understand what happens in the brain and body when you are upset and angry, and learn the benefits of turning impulsive reactions into responses that you choose. Creating and maintaining strong, fulfilling relationships doesn't mean disregarding your own boundaries or letting go of what you want for the sake of keeping the peace in your home, family, friend group, or workplace. Instead, it means being more yourself! By moving into the fulness of who you are, you can claim freedom and agency in your own life, learn how to release blame, and cultivate happier and healthier relationships with those you love.

Third edition of this classic on family therapy. The introduction calls it a conceptual frame around which to organize your data and your impressions . . . a suggested path.

A self-guided workbook to lead yourself through the IFS process and create inner harmony and peace, as endorsed by Dr. Richard C. Schwartz, founder of Internal Family Systems

Transform the way you relate to yourself and your mental health struggles with this clear and structured guide to Internal Family Systems (IFS), an evidence-based approach to parts work therapy. The IFS model views every person as having an internal family of parts or subpersonalities, each with their own set of thoughts, feelings, and roles. Some parts hold pain from the past, while others work to prevent that pain from surfacing. When parts are understood and accepted, they can release this pain and heal.

Developed by a veteran IFS clinician who has lived, practiced, and trained others on the IFS model for more than 25 years, The Self-Led Internal Family Systems Workbook can help you connect to your true, authentic Self--which is always inside of you, ready to lead--so you can meet your internal family of parts, respond compassionately when they're activated, and send them healing energy when they need it.

Key features of this workbook:

• Accessible Self-Paced Process. Move through the IFS practice at your own speed and comfort level using IFS skills that have been adapted for beginners.
• Clear and Structured Approach. Bring clarity and insight to your internal world by navigating it with step-by-step skills, exercises, and worksheets.
• Strategies for Common IFS Challenges. Learn to work with parts that keep you stuck in problematic cycles and offer compassion to deeply wounded parts.
• Transcripts of Self-Led IFS Sessions. See how an IFS clinician works with her own parts to address challenges like perfectionism, impulse control, and more.

I am very grateful to my friend Tanis Allen for creating this clear, practical workbook for helping people access Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy on their own. Because she knows IFS so well, she not only offers very useful and easily followed exercises but also the important cautions and guidelines to make this powerful work safe. I enthusiastically endorse this book and see it as an important contribution to the big project of helping everyone change their inner relationships and become more Self-led.
--Richard C. Schwartz, PhD, founder of the Internal Family Systems model of psychotherapy

Police families are brave, resilient, and proud--and they face remarkable challenges, sometimes on a daily basis. Now thoroughly updated for today's turbulent times, this is the resource that cops and their loved ones have relied on for decades. Trusted expert Ellen Kirschman gives you practical ways to manage the stress of the job and create a healthy, supportive home environment. The third edition features the latest information, new stories from police families, two new chapters, and fully updated resources. Dr. Kirschman acknowledges the tough realities of life on the force and offers frank, realistic suggestions for handling everyday relationship dilemmas as well as serious issues like trauma, domestic violence, and alcohol abuse. Whether you read this book cover to cover or reach for it when problems arise, you will find no-nonsense guidance to help your family thrive.

Mental health professionals, see also Counseling Cops: What Clinicians Need to Know, by Ellen Kirschman, Mark Kamena, and Joel Fay.

Annotated transcript of Satir conducting family therapy -- showing what she's thinking and how she selects a particular phrase or intervention -- and then an account of her theoretical foundations and methods.

Full of juicy, concrete advice to heal from an affair. --Esther Perel, MA, LMFT, New York Times bestselling author of Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs

From a clinical psychologist who served as a clinical supervisor in the Department of Psychology at Yale University, received the CPA's award for Distinguished Contribution to the Practice of Psychology, and has treated couples and trained therapists for over four decades, this newly updated, award-winning book provides concrete, proven strategies for those who seek to survive their partner's infidelity and to rebuild the relationship after an affair.

There is nothing quite like the devastation caused when a partner has been unfaithful. Hurt partners often experience a profound shattering of their familiar and valued sense of self and fall into a depression that can last for years. For the relationship, infidelity is often a death blow.

This new third edition of After the Affair, with more than 600,000 copies sold, helps guide both hurt and unfaithful partners through three stages of healing: normalizing the crisis, deciding whether to recommit to their partner, and rekindling trust and sexual intimacy. It includes a new section in which patients ask questions not addressed in previous editions, and the author provides concrete strategies for earning trust and forgiveness.

Drawing on cutting-edge research on adult attachment--and providing an innovative roadmap for clinical practice--Susan M. Johnson argues that psychotherapy is most effective when it focuses on the healing power of emotional connection. The primary developer of emotionally focused therapy (EFT) for couples, Johnson now extends her attachment-based approach to individuals and families. The volume shows how EFT aligns perfectly with attachment theory as it provides proven techniques for treating anxiety, depression, and relationship problems. Each modality (individual, couple, and family therapy) is covered in paired chapters that respectively introduce key concepts and present an in-depth case example. Special features include instructive end-of-chapter exercises and reflection questions.

Widely used by family therapists-- and by health care professionals in general--the genogram is a graphic way of organizing the mass of information gathered during a family assessment. This visual representation allows the practitioner to find patterns in the family system for more targeted treatment.

Now in its fourth edition, Genograms has been fully updated by renowned therapist Monica McGoldrick. Expanded with four-color images throughout, additional material explaining the use of genograms with siblings and couples, and a thorough updating to essential concepts, this edition provides a fascinating view into the richness of family dynamics.

Informative, comprehensive, and beautifully written and illustrated, this book helps bring to life principles of family system theory and systemic interviewing, as well as walk readers through the basics of constructing a genogram, doing a genogram interview, and interpreting the results.

You can help even the most conflicted, disconnected couples restore and heal their relationship.

IFS Couple Therapy Skills Manual presents clinicians with a powerful, non-pathologizing approach to helping couples better understand themselves, their differences, and the underlying reasons for their suffering.

Working from the lens of Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) - a branch of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy - the authors provide a highly successful therapy that allows couples to feel understood, to decrease shame, and to reestablish loving connections. Inside you'll find:

- Step-by-step techniques

- Case examples

- Experiential exercises

- Clear treatment explanations

- Downloadable worksheets

Tools, exploration, and actions to help you heal from intergenerational trauma

Start on the path to healing from trauma that has been passed down through your family. The Intergenerational Trauma Workbook helps you understand the ways in which trauma can move from generation to generation while also providing practical, straightforward exercises to help you grow and heal.

Drawing on their combined decades of experience treating trauma, Dr. Lynne Friedman-Gell and Dr. Joanne Barron have created an accessible and compassionate workbook that teaches you how to recognize and identify the effects that intergenerational trauma is having on your life. You'll discover a variety of easy-to-use, evidence-based strategies that will not only help you heal but also help break the cycle of your family's trauma.

The Intergenerational Trauma Workbook features:

• Intergenerational focus--Get advice specifically tailored to deal with the unique challenges and consequences of family trauma passed down through generations.
• Proven techniques--Manage difficult thoughts and emotions, and heal your body and relationships, with techniques developed across years of clinical experience and practice.
• Supportive anecdotes--Realize you aren't alone, and draw strength from the stories of other people's healing journey from intergenerational trauma.

Begin the process of healing today with the Intergenerational Trauma Workbook.

If you are facing the unique challenges of caring for a parent with dementia, you are not alone. What do you do when your loved one so plainly needs assistance, but is confused, angry, or resistant to your help? Where can you find the vital information you need, when you need it? Journalist Thomas Harrison and leading geriatric psychiatrist Brent Forester show that you don't have to be a medical expert to be a good care provider in this authoritative guide. They explain the basics of dementia and offer effective strategies for coping with the medical, emotional, and financial toll. With the right skills, you can navigate changing family roles, communicate better with your parent, keep him or her safe, and manage difficult behaviors. Learn how to care smarter, not harder--and help your loved one maintain the best possible quality of life.

Winner (Second Place)--American Journal of Nursing Book of the Year Award, Consumer Health Category

Winner (Third Place)--Foreword INDIES Book of the Year Award, Family & Relationships Category

The highly influential book The Marriage Clinic presented a complete marital therapy program based on John Gottman's much-heralded research on marital success and failure. Since then, Dr. Gottman has collaborated with his wife, clinical psychologist Dr. Julie Gottman, to conduct their well-known Love Lab studies, allowing the pair to design a highly successful couples' workshop and develop their Sound Relationship House theory.

Now, in the book's first-ever revision, Dr. Gottman and Dr. Gottman incorporate the results of their studies and their most powerful interventions. In addition to its original, celebrated marital therapy program, The New Marriage Clinic includes findings on the dynamics of same-sex couples, interventions for couples recovering from situational domestic violence, strategies for couples rebuilding their marriages after an affair, and much more. No relational therapist's bookshelf is complete without this vital update to the groundbreaking guide on marital therapy.

Every couple has disagreements, but what happens when recurring conflicts start to pull your relationship apart? Do you lie awake hoping that your spouse will eventually see things your way, or rehashing the evidence that you're right? Demand some immediate changes--or else? This popular, science-based guide offers powerful solutions for couples frustrated by continual attempts to make each other change. True acceptance may seem difficult to accomplish, but the clear-cut steps and thought-provoking exercises in this book can make it a reality. You'll learn why you keep having the same fights again and again; how to keep small incompatibilities from causing big problems; what communication strategies really work to resolve conflicts; and how to problem-solve and make positive changes--together. Updated throughout with new research, practical tools, and examples, the second edition features a new chapter on mindfulness.

Mental health professionals: visit http: //ibct.psych.ucla.edu to learn about using this self-help guide as an adjunct to therapy.

A welcome companion book from a brilliant therapist (Maren Cooper, author of Finding Grace), this is a comprehensive and actionable guide to understanding and healing from narcissistic family abuse.

A pioneer on the devastating effects of narcissistic abuse, Karyl McBride, PhD, has the answer for anyone desperate for help in overcoming the damage of being raised in a family headed by a narcissistic parent.

Divided into three sections, McBride explores the insidious way a narcissistic environment is developed in a family, how a narcissistic parent damages a child's emotional growth and ability to trust, and finally, how to not only move on but become truly free. Along with an easy-to-follow five-step recovery program, plus a 33-question quiz to determine if you or a family member is displaying narcissistic traits, this must-read (Wendy Behary, author of Disarming the Narcissist) provides understanding and hope for anyone wishing to thrive after abuse.